Sunday, July 29, 2018

Forget Everything You Know, A Trombone Can Be Used For Rock Band's Vocals

New Game Today:

Although human history is littered with technological advancements, there are just a few that have irrevocably changed the course of our species. The advent of modern agriculture practices, for one. Perhaps Hungarian scientist Ignaz Semmelweis would qualify, with his work in the field of antiseptics. And now, in 2018, we've discovered that the vocal parts of Rock Band songs can be completed with a trombone. 

Rock Band's microphone grades performance based almost exclusively on pitch and timing; singing the lyrics to any Weird Al song will still get a perfect grade, as they should. 

In fact, this video proves, any lyrics are actually unnecessary. As long as you're good on the slide, a trombone will get you just as high a score.

Where do we go from here? Should the human race keep striving for advancement, or is this our pinnacle? If we could hear the lyrics to The Presidents of the United States of America's rock-anthem Lump, they would tell us: 

She's lump, she's lump
She's in my head
She's lump, she's lump, she's lump
She might be dead

I think I'm going to go on the record as saying the trombone is an improvement. 


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